Monday 14 April 2008

The Party's Over!

Hi! How is everyone? Am I the first one back, then? I have to confess I've got the mother of all headaches. What do you mean? I'm not shouting, I'm whispering!

I had to hitch from the police station, because none of the officers were travelling in this direction. It wasn't difficult, though, in my mini skirt and fishnets. By the time the driver was close enough to see my face, I'd got the door open and my substantial booty parked on the passenger seat. After I'd rabbited on, for 20 minutes or so, about virtual parties and the like, he was more than happy to push me out of the car as we passed the bottom of my road.

Those young policeman know how to party, don't they? I noticed they kicked us out of the station pretty sharpish, though, once the alcohol ran out.

We did have a great time, didn't we? I know I sound a bit unsure, but I can't remember too much about it, to be honest. I do keep recalling snatches of the evening from time to time, however. Hmmm ........

Whose idea was it to set off all of the fireworks at once? Really? Well, it certainly worked. I've never seen so many nice young men in uniforms arrive, en masse, at a party, in that way, before. Firemen; policemen; paramedics.

The fireworks display was truly spectacular. It didn't last very long, but the resulting blaze carried on for hours, I believe. I don't know why the firemen felt the need to zap us all, with those jets of water, just as we asked for a closer look at their hoses. I fell arse over tip down that grassy bank and saw more than a few stars, when I got to the bottom!

Wasn't it a blast playing that game of chase, with those nice young policemen and the police helicopters? They were bound to catch us in the end, though, weren't they? We could hardly walk in those stilettos, never mind run! Those police dogs were a bit unruly, I thought. I hope our wounds heal soon, without leaving a scar.

It was sweet of those nice young policemen to try and preserve the modesty of those of you who had stripped off, with their police helmets. We really needed a considerably larger number of police officers, though, I'm afraid.

I've found some of the tarty clothes, which were cast off with a certain amount of 'wild abandonment', as the evening progressed. They were strewn over the hedge at the side of the house. Who does the peephole bra belong to? Really, she's a bit of a dark horse, isn't she? Is it an Ann Summers?

I'm sorry to say that I rather lost count of those of you who were carried off on stretchers to the ambulance and those who were taken to the police station. As long as you're all okay, now, though, that's all that matters. Sorry? No, you're right. There seems to be a couple who haven't blogged, yet, today. I wonder what's happened to those 2? Just a second my phone's ringing.

It's okay. I know where they are, now. They must have stopped off at the children's playground, when we did the conga, down the High Street, in the early hours. Apparently, one's got her ample posterior stuck in one of the seats on the kiddies' roundabout, and the other's wedged at the top of the slide. I'd better get down there and see what I can do, I suppose. I must get these thigh-length, black suede stiletto boots off first, though. Now, where are my trainers?

Anyway, guys, it was a blast! Thanks, once again, for entering into the spirit of everything and being so entertaining. We must try and have another get together, in the summer. I think we'll need more alcohol, next time, though. Don't get changing those bank details or pin numbers, now.

Oh, I almost forgot! If I don't see you before, I'll see you when our case comes up, next month!

19 comments:

Maggie May said...

Oh my head! It still hurts! Can't remember anything about it at all! it's just as though it never happened! Thanks for asking me!
See you in court!


On a lighter note ..... I'm afraid you've been tagged. There's a message at my place explaining how & why!

Working Mum said...

Sorry I missed the party. I thought it was tomorrow. Mumnesia!

Mean Mom said...

maggie may - Ha Ha! Okay, coming over. Hope it's nothing difficult!


working mum - You missed a treat!

the mother of this lot said...

Whassat? Where is everybody....? What the hell I am still doing in this field.....?

Dusty Spider said...

About that peep hole bra... so sorry .. got really hot suddenly and had to cool down in the pond. Wondered where I'd left it! All rather embarrassing really as one of those lovely young policemen (the one with the dog) was my son. Had some explaining to do I can tell you but I managed to convince him to drop the charges on most of the partygoers, more sad than sinning I explained. He'll be keeping an eye on your place for a while though (sorry).. Flick xx
PS Love the award, many thanks.

Mean Mom said...

the mother of this lot - It's okay! I'm dashing out with something to cover your modesty!


dusty spider - LOL! Sorry about showing you up in front of your son. We did get a bit out of control. 'Sad' is certainly an apt description. Now, you've owned up to the peephole bra. Will anyone confess to getting stuck at the top of the slide, do you think?

Irene said...

Hee, hee, I didn't make it across the Channel and I see I missed a rip roaring night. All those nice young policemen, what a shame! I drank some at home though, in the spirit of things, so I was virtually there. i wore my super duper net stockings too and my peek a boo bra.

Mean Mom said...

sweet irene - We certainly livened up the neighbourhood! I do like a uniform! Glad you were able to join in at home. Yes, I believe you about the stockings and peekaboo bra. This is the beauty of the internet, we can wear whatever we like. Oooh! That's a thought. Now I've scared myself!

Irene said...

Dearest Mean Mom, thank you so much for letting me have the I've Got a Friend in You Award. I think I've truly got a friend in you, there is no doubt about it. I will post it with great love and affection in my sidebar.

Big hugs from the other sexy netted stocking wearing broad.

Milla said...

Goodness am I with you on the mumnesia. Although I call it mum'n'winenesia. I am very honest. Wish I had 3 sons, sob.

Mean Mom said...

sweet irene - It's a great pleasure and you do. (Have a friend in me, that is).


milla - Oh, that's a good word!! 3 sons? There have been times of complete and utter desperation, I assure you. Wouldn't be without them, of course!!!

aims said...

Ha! The jokes on you guys! The party continued for a few days in that cell and those coppers?? Man - could I tell you some stories!!

Now I must drag my weary body to the shower and try to get the stripes off of it. And here all along I thought I was wearing a prison uniform...(did you know that to save money they just spray it on? Gasp!)

Great party MM - let me know the next time you're having one. I'm going to ask the Sargeant to come along - (I think he's sweet on me)

Mean Mom said...

aims - The spray on stripes sound like fun. Shame I missed out on those.

You managed to pick somebody up, then? I think most of those nice young men in uniforms 'went off me' when they realised that they had gone to school with my sons. Sigh.

Thanks for coming.

Grit said...

please hold another party as i gate crashed the wrong field and spent the evening unable to get out of a conversation with a cow called brenda. she had much to say about the nature of clover.

Mean Mom said...

grit - You had quite an entertaining evening, too, then, in your own little way! Okay, I'll see what I can do.

Mid-lifer said...

Sounds positively wild mean mom - but PLEASE do not mention alcohol and hangovers - just recovering myself (though no playgrounds, congas or fireworks were involved!)

Mean Mom said...

mid-lifer - Oh dear! Okay! Nice to have a visit from you, anyway.

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Of feck I missed it! And after that great tea party the other day to. I'll be a character witness for you at court - you should be locked up in no time!

Mean Mom said...

mob - Thanks a lot! Some people think that is exactly where I should be, of course and can I blame them? No need to reply.